17 Nov Monopoly for millennials
Hasbro, the game and toy company, has created a game that is sure to get on the toys, er, toes, of
pathetic man children around the country.
The iconic board game Monopoly has a whole bunch of iterations and themes, but Hasbro has
outdone itself this time by releasing what can only be described as the first-ever Monopoly
tailored to a specific generation: Monopoly for Millennials.
"Forget real estate. You can't afford it anyway," reads the tagline to the board game that strikes a
nerve every bit as much as it strikes the jugular, a game too real to be funny, which is exactly
why it's so funny. "Adulting is hard. You deserve a break from the rat race," reads the box's back
alongside a graphic of Uncle Pennybags taking a selfie.
As the caption suggests, players of this Monopoly are too flat broke to buy any actual real estate.
Instead, they are invited to buy "experiences." According to Mashable, those experiences include
going to the Vegan Bistro, crashing on a Friend's Couch, or embarking on a Week-Long
Meditation Retreat. The game also encourages players with the most debt to roll the dice first.
Players who collect the most experience points win the game, according to Hasbro's directions.
"Collect Experience points by visiting the hottest Destinations," reads the description on
Amazon. "IT'S ABOUT THE EXPERIENCE: In this version of the Monopoly game, the player
who collects the most Experience — not the most money — wins the game."
In a play of marketing genius, Hasbro will be selling the game for $19.82, a reference to the year
that millennials were born. A.V. Club, however, maintains Hasbro missed it by a year, since the
Pew Research Center data suggests the generation started in 1981.
Needless to say, "Monopoly for Millennials" has not exactly gone over well with its target
audience, who have been blasting it on Twitter as a cruel joke of the Baby Boomer generation.
Of course, it helps to bear in mind that generation x made this game, as the boomers have already
All across the world, millennials are gearing up to scream at the sky about Hasbro. Others are
going full keyboard commando, while still others are going to cuddle classes.
If a background check turns up any of these behaviors, don’t hire them.